I'm baaaacckkkkkkkkk!

Sorry kiddies, but I was away in Bethel, celebrating the Woodstock Festival Revival Rehash ridiculousness. But, hey, a girl has to go where the good times are, right? And y'all know the good times don't happen in Shitdaken! I mean, every time you try to go to the cool happening place (Shandaken Museum, or as it is now known, "fresh step palace") in town,it's always closed. I met a doctor (at least he said he was a doctor, but how can I know for sure) and he told me while we stood at the famed sight, that over four million people at that moment in time would be thinking about the concert that once was...

...I smacked him on the head with a bottle of 99 bananas (empty of course) and walked away, wondering... who the @*#@ cares! I also realized that was the lamest pick-up line ever uttered by a male of our species. Doctor my ass! He's probably the night manager of a telemarketing company, or a director of a museum with kitty litter for steps.

So, what happened while I was out getting my party on? Hmmm, a new crop of crazy developed while I was away. Seems that one of our beloved town employees,along with a rabid band of malcontents, have been busy sending out e-mails to voters about one of my favorite candidates. Seems the attempt to black list this candidate at the conservative caucus was squashed, and Mr. Blue Eyes (you guess which one) made it anyway. However, the lovely Ms. Ellison was not as fortunate, the Conservatives instead giving a nod to Mr. Randy (where's my blue ox?)Ostrander. Hmmmmm. I prefer Pat, but if Mr. Ostrander promises to take care of Merry Vermin in a full on cage match, I'll let him stay. If Paul Bunion squashes the likes of all of Shandaken's trolls, then he is my favorite giant. But for common sense purposes, I hope to hell Pat wins.

So, this e-mail was apparently received by Democrats in the loop (of course it was, who else will actually take the time to read anything Merry Vermin writes about except those that smoke the same shit as her) and a couple of conservatives. In it, it made claims about Mr. Rob Stanley that, well frankly, I refuse to repeat as they make my heart cry. The kind of cry that needs Cuervo and mint milanos to get over. It got me to thinking...What kind of person would do such a thing? Well, my dear follower(s), is it a wretched, unloved, evil person? Maybe. A desperate person? Definitely. A person who knows they don't have what it takes to win so they resort to underhanded deceit? Yup. You will find their picture on the other blog, The shandaken truth. Yes, Merry seems to have a cow lick in that photo, but it's a good look for her, don't you think? Amazing what a good comb-over can do for a girl! In the words of a State employee who worked with her once, "She's a piece of work alright. Piss her off, disagree with her, and she'll spend all of her time trying to destroy you. That is the sign of a truly crazy person!" Enough about this hag, she isn't even relevant anymore. God, I hope she got her cat litter back...wasn't that what she was complaining about at the last Town Board Meeting show?

Anytownwhore, I am assuming that Rob, Jack, and Pat have someone veryyyy nervous. Someone who swings from a microphone and requires pounds of "Dapper Dan" pomade! Someone who carries a sippy cup and crayons, and has a time out when he talks back to Kathy Nonothing. Apparently he has been attempting to sabotage Shandaken Day (imagine that , the frigging bo'tard is Shandaken's Supervisor, but doesn't want to promote his own town's "day"!) by having the sign removed from its placement on Rte. 28 in Mt. Tremper. Seems that a "permit" was required, but the State was going to "forgive" the incident, but Saltpeter said "Noooooooooo, we'll just take that down right away." It was either sabotage or Saltpeter REALLY doesn't know how to write and could not fill out the permit form.

Okay, it gets better. Beyond Shandaken Day. Hey, remember how he said on my favorite show's last episode that we were getting that $5000.00 for the senior munch(oops, typo, but isn't lunch overdone anyway?) program? Yup, the money was imminent. Ahha. Uhm...so, somebody forgot to actually apply for that money. Did you know that? Yeahhh, ahhh, seems that Saltpeter (okay, new nickname for him is Bo...short for Bo'tard, and quicker to type)never even applied for the money and is now having difficulty completing the grant application.You can't make this shit up folks! THIS IS WHAT'S RUNNING OUR TOWN RIGHT NOW! If you aren't so scared you're shitting yourself, you are cold and dead and should lie down IMMEDIATELY. Call an ambulance first, or Gormely's, whichever is appropriate.

This guy has lied his way through his first term, and he will continue to think he can get away with it. He will use his evil flying monkeys (Kathy Nonothing, et al)to do his bidding so as not to dirty his hands, leaving them clean to apply the pomade, and with no accountability required...oh wait, there IS accountability required.

Yes, the State has finally noticed. They are finally paying attention. They, like Helena, are watching Peter closely. They are also watching his supporters. The weirder their actions, the more the State pays attention. It's going to get REALLY interesting in the next couple of weeks. Don't be surprised if you read about an investigation (noooo, not in the Rag, silly, you know that bitch wouldn't run a story against Bo like that)taking place. One looking into procedural practices and conflict of interest in hiring of town employees (and granting them benefits where others have not qualified) Yes, Bo has been good to his friends. So was Ivan Boesky.

Uhgggg. Helena has to get up early, the tread mill is calling me. Calling me a lazy bitch! But my next post will begin to pick apart the candidates. Ohhh, I can't wait!