Ahhh, yeah, Row B is my Bitches!

So, who do you want running your town? Helena tends to vote for the guy who:
A. Is not a cartoon character
B. Has a cool goatee in place of a dated, out o' control mustache hell bent on world dominance.
C. Knows what he is doing.

With the latest (won't say last, as I'm still waiting for the "Rob molests goats" letter to show up in my mailbox today) bit of propaganda sent out by the Democrats, I would assume that NASA's successful string of launches this year can be attributed to our current ball und chain
"Peteyorite" DiSclafluffy. This mailer started with something along the lines of "some might try to convince you that things are not well with Shandaken..." no SHIT! But, then, it goes on to say things are super rosey (they forgot to include the rose-colored glasses for readers) and lists all sorts of events that take place or took place in the town this year. None of which had anything to do with Peteyorite, yet once again, his advisers have taken the liberty to give credit to Petey for all things wonderful. So, on that note, let me add to Peteyorite's other lists of accomplishments this past 20 months that he also has nothing to do with:

- saved thousands of jobs with his national stimulus package
- Helped Meb Keflezighi win the New York Marathon by coaching him and feeding him 'sgetti and meatballs
-welded the scrap metal from ground zero that is now on the USS New York.
-Assembled the USS New York from the scrap metal from ground zero.
-Convinced Afgani President Karzai to hold a re-vote in his country.

But seriously, I think my beh-behs know who to vote for.

First, you have the Assessor's office. JoJo and Johnny need to get these spots, you need unbiased assessing, because we all know that the Days of "Personal Opinion Assessments" must come to an end NOW! No more "this bitch is gonna pay big 'cause I don't like her"or "this bitch gets a break 'cause they liked my dress at the last Christmas party" shit. These two people will make everything all better.

Then, for Judges, hands down you know who has to go in. Tom (the incumbent) and Charlie can easily serve the needs of the community fairly. Don't know how long this Amy Brown has lived here, but I picture her living in a broom closet somewhere in the Monastery, waiting for her 2 hours of daylight allowance when she can come out and be among "the others". Miranda, eh, you know about him selling me that used car, so nuff said!

Councilmen. Now, you can't let me down on this one, my chillens! If Jack and Pat are not elected, Helena is going to throw a hissy fit like none you've ever seen before. Like Merry Vermin's hissy fits, only with people actually being hurt! When I throw a hissy fit, I throw furniture along with it! Antique, re-finished furniture! The heavy shit! This is where the name "cloudspinners" came from, just for your reference!

Now, on to Supervisor. You know where Helena stands on this one. If you don't then you're new to this page, and if so, where the hell have you been?

Robbie is going to walk away from this one, and you know how I know this? I was sitting with Petey, Merry, Ms. Knownothing, and "the Rose" the other night, and we were all talking about what we were gonna do after election. Pete the meat said he was going back to Colorado and take up horse back riding. Merry said she would be looking for a job at the "Blue Jay Way" on North Front Street. Ms. Knownothing said she did not have to make any changes because she did not work, was only an advisor, and would find some other poor sap to sit and listen to her ramblings for hours on end. Me, I just kept my mouth quiet. I cant' lose my job. When you drink for a living, there is real job security in it. Thank you Hennesey.

So, Rob, my Superman, I've called the election already and you've got your work cut out for you. But you are more than up to the challenge. This is what you've spent the last four years grooming for. No one was able to intimidate you, make you cry, or change your mind. You stuck to your guns, played the maverick, and worked tirelessly. Now it's up to you. Work well with the others, play by the rules, make decisions that will enable you to continue to hold your head up high, and never take the low ground.

That is why Helena is voting for you.

That is why Helena is voting for EVERYONE on row B- because all you bitches are bitches who can still walk around holding your heads up high in this lowly berg.

Good luck to my chillens!

I, along with Mr. Jim Beam, will be rooting for you.